Persisting through a storm of understanding
Inner voices as loud as thunder slamming
Being consumed by flashes of rage and cower
But I know that every fool’s a seed; every sage, a flower
Differences in what you do and if you’re willing
Experiences that define who you are or who you will be
Life — something we all struggle to handle
Through stress, we make sacrifices
Just something we have to
I’m saying we as humans make mistakes
Have you seen what struggling hands do?
With hope, help will double your happiness
You have one life to live, and two hands to give
Spread love and give those who struggle a hand too
You presume it’s fair, what could you prepare for?
Because you’ve been there before; it’s human error
We’ve all been forced by mirrors
To look within, see nothing and have no idea
No iota what being here means
Where life brought you, what might cost you
You know — that feeling fear brings
Whether you talk to yourself, are you hearing mere things
Sand slipping, but feel your hand gripping, steering sheer dreams
Delusions deluge, we aren’t what we think we are
The shell we hide behind tells us that brink is far
Afraid of falling in love but that edge is close
Realize you’ll attach to any string when you wish to tether rope
Do you want to feel caressed or corrected?
Or better yet, to be possessed or protected?
Your sense of security isn’t that secure to me
So cure empty feelings, rid the pathos
Treasure everything your ridden path owes
Pat those who live with bruised knees, with whom you walk with
Every step seems small, but I know every move is karmic
So for as long as I live, I’ll no longer conceal conceit
I now can see, I now concede

A. Hymn, Concession

Hold on, you add to me
Loneliness is a plague that spreads from the soul to reality
Prone to detach quickly, I want this to last
We can’t search for the same love, get lost in our past
I won’t bother to ask, wander a path of doubt
But, they tell me it’s thought that’ll count
Hope to evoke every feeling
I could always do good, but never feel it
Motivated by sheer lust, but torn, whether to share love
And have you give back to me
Or leave you uncared for, impact you with apathy
Is that you, my fantasy?
And maybe they’ll compare us
Judge our appearance
How we’re not a pair, how one is the fairest
Trying to find peace just hoping I don’t overdo
My love and happiness is overdue
Up late overnight, I overthink
Over who? Poetry I overwrite
Just so these feelings I can override
Scared to overwhelm, and be overbearing
Trying to please your overall distaste
So I might overcompensate, but…
Pledge to me when we meet, all I want is you
Being all I can be, is what I promise you
Pledge to me and I promise you
Pledge to me and I promise you

A. Hymn, The Pledge I

Feel the salient gift of the day we are in
Lift my windows up, radiance in
Sunsets and gradient winds
Praise it, the gift of the day we are in
Before it’s too late to begin
Before it’s too late to begin

We’ve come a long way, a long walk
From depressed to deep breaths
We turn off the music to let our song talk
To hear passions that were long lost
As parts of our past fade, they belong lost
Let clauses flow, don’t pause it
Let every thought spawn
Let life come to life, let this sunny gift
Remind us of the loved ones we grip
Every sight sweeter than earth’s honey
It dawned on us what we feel isn’t worth money
Birth funny moments, they’ll never escape
We hold them, we’re golden
If something’s missing? Give more then
Rip open the whole, dive in – be a part of it all
Vulnerability is a cardinal flaw
Cardigans, fall, sense the breeze
Sense the air, set it free
And once the day is set, we’ve paid our debts
Don’t let anything they say regress
Feel generous, be grateful you can give away regrets
Because we learn from yesterday on how to savor today the best

Feel the salient gift of the day we are in
Lift my windows up, radiance in
Sunsets and gradient winds
Praise it, the gift of the day we are in
Before it’s too late to begin
Before it’s too late to begin

A. Hymn, Abendrot

See, I used to look up to you, seen you as a figure of light
Bigger than life when I was little and bright
You drifted from sight, gifts couldn’t suffice
The claims of you being worthless, that image was wide
Is praise of you even worth it, or am I imprisoned to pride?
I quit spending even a wink about you missing
My interests subsided, indifferent to whatever
Commitments – its lies
I made it this far without your visiting, it’s fine
Living livid in life, plus you got other children and I
Wish you can give them visions to rise
I’m at the point where I’m conditioned, inhibited
All the quivers and cries of rivers
I’m built just like I could give a damn about all the forgiveness you pine
All that shit is ridiculous, frivolous, stupid and unwise
Foolish at this time, and mom hates the excuses you use
She’s bitter with gripe, even pities you
But encourages me to give you some mind
In hopes this demolition revives through repetition and tries
Now that premonition just dies, the real definition of ice
My friends are inquisitive as to why
My words never refer to you
It’s pointless, trivial, and just tired
Maybe if you didn’t leave me all by my lonesome
Just maybe – just maybe I might show some
Emotion, everything I have to show for it, I keep it inside
At times I feel like I’d call you a pathetic fool
But I’m apathetic too
So if you ever get any inclination to pick up the phone
Give up, and go lift up one of those kids you’ve given a home

Standing deep in the wake
I just want to take a moment
To take a good look around
At all the debris in the wake

Let this serve as a note to my mom
How you cope with just all of life
The strife as you pour out your heart
For me and those where you work at your job
A nurse that gives
Yet you don’t need the money to know what you are
The glow that you spark despite all the stress
That tolls up, it’s hard
And at times you take it out on me
I forget how you could’ve taken a different route without me
So I sail this hardship with you
Even though sometimes I feel us growing apart
Resentment has me torn up and scarred
But again it’s let me know not to fold with my cards
To hold from the start
Yet with you hardly there with me
I didn’t know how to mold with my thoughts
Alone in the dark, with defective affection
Asking less for attention, now I don’t ever go for my wants
Never going to expose, always feeling as if my emotions were barred
But I want to go forth and go far
Limited by myself when I felt I’m all that I’ve had
So I grabbed a pen with a ballpoint and a pad
Palmed in my hand, trying to express myself farther than man
Writing poems that last
Hoping I can turn my guard to a garden with paths
And I see now that this was just part of a plan
To give more than we thought of or asked

Standing deep in the wake
I just want to take a moment
To take a good look around
At all the debris in the wake

A. Hymn, The Wake: Take A Good Look Around

To live or exist, why are my interests so complex
Being and feeling are two different concepts
Due to my inner learning, I’m introverted
Does that make me self-absorbed? Well-informed?
Well I’m foreign to love, I forfeit
And yet, they ask me for love advice
Maybe ask how I’m doing, see if I’d love advice
Lust for affinity got me thinking love’s a vice
But when my search is over, will my love suffice?
His love’s of ice, but a cold heart isn’t void of feeling
It’s ability to give was never appointed freedom
I’m not the one and someone just might be
Better, but rather tell her “you’ll find some warmth inside of me
You’ll feel at home, confide in me
Come finding me when you’re lost”
See, I had some choose body over soul
Her human nature calls, and I’m on hold
She lusts for somebody she can hold
When I’d love for somebody to feel more
Often I deplore, they say I’d be a deep lover
And yet I haven’t felt
Sometimes caught up in my loneliness
I forget some don’t even have themselves
A brisk childhood, reaping only the torment after
I always felt lonely before it mattered
I thought hard about that last one and
Realized I’m the only one who listens to myself and answers back
So do you believe it is sin to keep it in?
I stay deepened in independence, penning
So I make sure when I think, to think if it’s worth it
Whenever I speak, to speak with a purpose
Maybe we relate
Depression’s more than a mental state
Sadness may never want to leave
But we can’t give up and let it stay
Music is what keeps me sane when I’m so distressed
So for as long as I live, I’m praying I don’t go deaf
Balanced with writing, I’m scaling my own soul’s depth
And see life as greater than some dole mess
Content or contempt, the void of one appoints another
Like Cain and Abel, pain enabled
One to thrive, then hate and destroy its brother
Which will die first? Will I last or my will die first?
My pride thirsts for intimate kindred instants
A timid spirit by default, I felt hidden since
I was forced to build resistance to neglect
Indifference since affected my inhibitions to connect
Clenched fist to regret, I hold
No price to my life, but this is taxing my soul
Backed in a hole, bite my pain down
Write my way out, recite someday, vows
To the closest, my self-portrait’s an opus
For the day I’m faced by an angel
It’s a silly phase; a pretty face can be fatal
Vain, feign and unfaithful
Full of temptation, I crave but
Wane away into the cracks of the wall
If I didn’t sit back, I’d sit tall

A. Hymn, Wallflower

Loss or deprivation?
How long can you be without somebody if you can’t imagine them?
Cannot fathom the face, am I really lonely if I’ve never grasped their hand?
If it was never given, why does it feel like it was taken away?
Maybe I’ve mistaken my fate
This emptiness inside can never be replenished with a smile
It’s tempting me to side with my independence
But it’s hard to go against my inner tension
Or maybe my love has gone from myself to an idea
I fear I maybe a hopeless romantic
More like a lonely fanatic
To live with someone open, organic
Or maybe my love has gone from myself to an idea
I fear a dream that will never come to fruition
If my heartbeat drums, would you listen?
With your endeavors sung through your kisses
But at some point you revisit – reality
Your vision skipped facts to believe
The space between the world and my dreams
Made the space between me, and the girl of my dreams
That’s why I gave up searching for a pearl in the sea
I can’t swim, and I can’t seem
To figure out if love is worth it for me
Or maybe it’s perfect for me, but for now I feel the same
Hopefully I fall for you as you see me change
Seasons change, and for what?
Reasons range
People say it’s the leaves, the rain
The breeze, the rays of sun
One thing’s for sure, we ease a way
Or ease away

Sometimes I wish on these lonely nights
That someone could hold me tight
And told me why I feel this way
Help heal this pain of an only child
No reminders of the past dreaming
No one to console these cries
So I close these eyes into a dole sleep
No deep ties to a woman in love
And with any woman that would
I wouldn’t give up
But could I live up to her?
I could easily be the one who isn’t enough
Fool bliss for a bluff
Attempts at a true kiss and a hug
The proof lives in the trust
A romantic that believes in their intuition
Yet a pessimist, I’m really not into wishin
I’d give you distance if you feel the pain when I drift
As you see me change because
Seasons change, and for what?
Reasons range
People say it’s the leaves, the rain
The breeze, the rays of sun
One thing’s for sure, we ease a way
Or ease away

A. Hymn, Seasons: Paradox of the Heart

I see lives on a destructive path, down the route to their grave
With every hand out, here comes the black cloud with the rain
Keeping all the doubt into play, nothing to drought it or drain
Yet flowers are supposed to sprout from the rain
But after a couple tries, once you’ve pushed and you pounced
And get used to the ground, you embrace the shower and stain
Now as you cower away, what do you plan to do
Will you just sit out there and fade, counting the days
Or show what every ounce of you’s capable of
By the power, the grace, and the nouns and the hate
That you’ve been drowned in to date
With every frown you refrain to pout you just paint
A smile, that could flick a fountain to flame
Mince a mountain to clay and claim out loud
That you’ll amount to and make something of yourself
Now that mound called your grave, could have been you
So how about that now just be proud for today
So Smile

Smile because sometimes
We all wish for half the magic, to snap your fingers
Or clap to hinder and make sadness vanish
Feeling backed, imbalanced, it’s hard to explain the pain of
Feeling malice, madness, feeling frantic, famished
Feeling bashed with rancid acid eating a hole, deep in your soul
A massive black pit, damaged, even a joke becomes a tad bit vapid
Feeling you’re last, invalid, feeling you cannot manage
Feeling angst and anguish, feeling weighted down
To the pavement bound til you cave in now
Feeling your passion lapsed and your paths collapsed in
In fact it happens to the best of us, pressure just messes up
Everything but don’t ration your satisfaction
You’ll find a way back, you just have to map it
Then whatever you think you lack, rehash it
Stop lying to yourself, stop trying on the mask of sadness
Get past this tacit act, make laugh your practice
So Smile

Smile because
There is no true test to the bit of our features limit
Cause we all have the power of a hero within
Its deep inside, all it takes is just a tweak of your lips
God’s given gift, to free the bleak by breathing and being the bliss
In their deepest wishes, a deed seemingly fit
It’s the glee and felicity that we feel to emit
Hold their hand, raise their chin and just speak from within
And the sun wont be the only radiance that can give
Cuz even when feeling grief begins to beat your spirit
Some teeth and a grin will rid of all the fearfulness in
Those close to you, so giggle, speak, believe that you can leap over this
Cuz no matter how frequent the people feed from weakness
Remember that they’ll never deplete your image
And if you ever wonder if they’re appreciative
The difference it springs or even the distance it sprints
Take the S and place it after the E finishes, it’ll go for MILES
So Smile

A. Hymn, Smile