patience is all one can have. yet i feel that since i know what i want to achieve. where i want to go. what i deserve. that i’m already being too hard on myself within my own process.

i can’t say for sure.
but right now

i feel inspired, yet agitated.
i feel avid, yet frustrated.
i feel excited, yet miserable.
i feel hopeful, yet dissatisfied.

everything and in between.

seeing where i want to be,
yet feeling completely lost.

but patience is the one thing we will always have —
remember that.

A. Hymn || stuck in the middle, but not for long

 

words couldn’t come any harder
the exhale couldn’t pass any harsher
lately i’ve been focusing the lens on me
weighing my needs with those who depend on me
understanding what it is that i strive for
all of the things that keep me alive or
the handful of things that i’m willing to die for
growing up always hearing how i needed to try more
now engaging with the world around me
no longer grounded — i’m just looking to try more
wishful experimentation
learning the true meaning of balance
getting closer to my dreams is a challenge
my endeavors are pulling me this way
but don’t think i’m pushing you away
i don’t mistake your love for possession
but nobody likes distance and you want to prevent it
you may yearn my attention
while i’m trying to see how many steps it takes to make an impression
and i wish i could go back to simpler days
but i’m trying to break out of my shell
please allow me to incubate
the same way that i give you space
i appreciate you in every way
thinking about you everyday
just know this is a journey i’d want you to come with
cheering me on from the start
and in your heart you’ve never wanted me to give up since
i just wish i knew where this path would take me
so i wouldn’t have to see you stand there waiting
despite the breeze of doubt
nothing can abate me
and if no one believes me now
they won’t have a chance to break me
so once the dust settles and the horizon appears
i hope they can see i never complied to my fears
goals demand hard work and i plan to supply them with tears
supply them with sweat; supply them with blood
embracing myself and now truly recognizing my tier
i feel nothing but this intuitive strength in me
i’m going to really prove that it’s destiny
a steady incline yet pretty much my deadliest climb
fate come and get me — it’s time

A. Hymn || destiny ii